Breakup Letter to Cake

Dear Cake,

You seduced me and made me subject to your whims. I would leave the house in the middle of the night just for you. I would bake at midnight and eat in secret to hide my shame.

I loved your sickly sweet smell of sugar and shortening. You made my mouth water in anticipation of the impending treat, now my mouth waters because your aroma nauseates me.

I gave you undying devotion, you gave me diabetes and a fat ass.

I feel like we've grown apart.

I'm breaking up with you.

Goodbye

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